Archive for the 'leadership' Category

25
Feb

on the preaching of many sermons

By couch 1 Comment
Categories: Heart, Preaching and leadership

Preached my head off and my heart out tonight - the third message in 48 hours I have given. Even though I felt at the height of weakness, the Lord was gracious to me, surely because of His love for me and for the hearers, and His earnest desire and understanding that the messages on His love were necessary, exceedingly more so that I’ll ever know or be able to communicate.

It is an amazing gift of the Lord to preach, and a joy to be "caught up" in the whirlwind of His word, speaking the things you hear, see, and experience, and the things you catch glimpses of, though afar off, but in the straining of prayer and voice attempt to articulate. It is sincerely humbling, for every time you see how much you need the very Word you gave, perhaps moreso than those hearing! And, having reached a pinnacle with the revelation you were given, you proclaim it, only to see, as you do, that there are infinitely higher heights that you have yet to even begin to understand.

You don’t despise the revelation, for it is high to you, but for the greater heights one must continually lay Himself down, trusting in the readiness of the Father to lift us up and take us ever step of the way. You don’t know what to do, either to continue to plead the truth from the peak on which you stand, or continue to press on to higher heights. Then, the word hits you, "My son, do not cease to learn, lest you forget what you’ve already learned." And higher and higher you go, knowing you don’t fully understand where you’ve been but that you must go onward in the hand of a trustworthy guide.

More acutely, there is this restlessness, especially after preaching, this ache that seems to grow. It can be easily dulled by going into some other mind-numbing activity, but it returns again and again. It is the feeling of being poured out, which is a good thing, and it is that feeling that is inspiring us to be filled again, lest we, being in the vulnerable state of emptiness we are in, are quickly filled with something other and darker.

For me, it is also this feeling that reminds me that preaching is never and can never be my highest calling. Oh how I used to think it truly was in God. How thankful I am now that its’ not! It is surely a joy and a blessing, but it reinforces what I know to be true, that my highest calling is my own personal singular pursuit of the knowledge of God. That alone is eternal life (John 17:3), that alone satisfies and sustains, and though I am called to preach, my identity is a child of God meant to be in His embrace. Seasons of preaching will surely come and they will go, but let my heart always be before Him, the all-consuming fire.

To the young(er) preacher, I exhort you - do not be deceived, though many men make a glamorous picture of preaching, they may still be dead on the inside, bored in their life with God. Your heart before the Lord, more than your words before men, will sustain you in the night hour. Then, your preaching, having been placed in proper order, will be more authentic, and God will honor that with grace and favor. So I am believing for myself!

01
Feb

leadership: what about a wife?

By couch 1 Comment
Categories: Articles and leadership

As you all know, I’m privileged to be married to one of the most amazing of God’s creation, Jenny the Carson the Couch. She makes me laugh all the time, and her smile is daily my joy. She’s extremely intuitive and very smart, and seeing her grow through seasons of testing and blessing is truly an honor. Plus, she kind of likes me, and that really, really helps.

As God has us working with college students, we spend a lot of time with singles and not married couples, though we are thankful for the jaunts with the Arbuckles, Shaws, and Stockbergers when we can get together with them. I don’t consider myself a marriage expert by any means, but I’ve been thinking more recently about how exactly one goes about leading His wife spiritually.

Ironically, its not something I think about very much, how I “lead” my wife, and to be honest, I’m not that convinced that its’ something I should be thinking about too hard. It’s certainly important, but like many things in our Christian life, the more we look to ourselves the less we learn, the more we analyze ourselves the more we find ourselves back where we started in confusion. Oppositely, the more we look at Jesus, learn from Him, and are filled with His truth and passion, the more things begin to work themselves out day by day, from strength to strength, faith to faith, and glory to glory. Hallelujah, amen.

I want to lead my wife better, for sure! And I know I have lots to learn. But, especially as some of our friends are getting married soon, or have recently been married, I thought I’d share a bit of the wisdom I have gleaned over my 3.5 years of matrimony.

And let’s get right to my point. Leading your wife does not mean helping her understand theological knowledge. Leading your wife doesn’t necessarily mean “teaching” your wife. Though it may be apart of it, I don’t believe teaching your wife the Bible is the primary means of how you lead her spiritually. In fact, if you make it your primary means of leadership, your wife will end up feeling more like your student, disciple, or follower, and not your wife. This is not good - she is your partner!

Some marriages have a new believing husband and a wife who has grown up in the faith. Because of this, the man often feels very insecure, as he is growing into maturity and is expected to lead his more mature wife. He therefore tries to read great books, study deep theological concepts, and grow in His “knowledge of the scripture” quickly, to make up the gap he feels so readily before him. Though none of these things are wrong, it is a subtle deception in understanding what true spiritual maturity is - and mere theological knowledge is not maturity. Neither is it a basis of leadership.

Biblically, we are told that spiritual maturity is the measure of Christ-likeness we walk in. The Holy Spirit is taking what is Christ’s and making it known to us (John 14), so that we might know Him and be transformed into His image (2 Cor. 3:18, Romans 8:26-28). We would do well as husbands to learn the Holy Spirit’s model of leading us to maturity, that we might follow that pattern with our wives.

Instead of trying to grow in our knowledge and then “leading” our wives with our new found depth of theological knowledge, I propose an alternative. Fall in love with Jesus. Truly - deeply - madly! Let your passion for Him grow day by day. Seek Him, yes through the Scriptures, but also in your everyday life. Don’t just imitate the principles of the Bible, seek the God who can breathe on those principles and cause them to work in you from the inside out.

And as you do, your wife will follow. You can’t lead her somewhere you aren’t going! And teaching through the Bible, though important, is not an end destination. The Bible is meant to be the gateway into a living, breathing, vibrant relationship with God Himself. That’s the end we want as Christians, to be found in Him, to be found like Him, to be found with Him in what He is doing.

You may be 1 year old in the Lord and she 10, but if your passion for the Lord is fresh and hot, she and many others will be lining up to follow you. Even if it isn’t immediate, don’t be fake, but commit yourself to the process to knowing Christ for yourself. It takes time, and your pursuit of God will be contagious to your wife and will be an excellent means of leadership. Perhaps this is why Paul said in 1 Corinthians 11, before going on to discuss the authority of a husband over a wife, says in verse 1 “Follow me as I follow Christ” or “As I follow Christ’s example, you do the same”.

And what was Christ’s example? He was always speaking about the Father. Always passionate about revealing Him, showing His beauty and the wisdom of His ways. He didn’t do anything in order to gain favor in the religious crowd - never once tried to put himself forward by his deep theological knowledge. No, He said - I do what I see the Father doing, and say what I hear the Father saying. And the Father is not feigned of passion. The Father, who “so loved” the world, is a whirlwind of Holy Fire and Glory, igniting our often bored and apathetic hearts aflame again.

And that is something all Christians, no matter how mature, are in continual need of - a constant recapturing of our heart by that which truly matters - the One who created us.

This is Christ-likeness, to go after a deepening relationship with the Father of passion. The eternal life that is to know Him and to love Him with all our heart, mind, soul, and strength. And that’s the best way I believe we can lead our wives, because its how Jesus leads His Bride, the church!